Home Is Where The Heart Is (Connor)

Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

March, 2014 || Song Townhouse

Rhian ran around her flat, double and triple checking that she had everything she needed. Really, she was just Flooing over the the Song's home. It wasn't as if she was taking a weekend trip away and needed to pack. But...she couldn't stop her hands from shaking with nerves as she checked the lock on her door again, her fingers brushing over the wrapped gift sitting on her her kitchen counter.

This would be the first time she'd seen Connor since December, and her chest felt tight at the thought. No matter how she'd tried to convince herself that it was just a normal visit back home, nothing to worry about, when she woke up this morning all of that flew out the window.

She checked her reflection in the tall mirror she'd stuck to the outside of her bathroom door. With so little space in the studio flat, she had to get creative. An easy charm turned her short locks into soft waves, and she's chosen a bold lip color she'd seen Tess sport a time or two. When she'd applied it, she almost felt like she was putting on battle armor. Like this small layer of war paint could protect her from whatever was going to happen.

She could only hope.

Smoothing down her skirt one last time, her fingers fidgeted with the small buttons at her wrists as she slipped on her tan Mary Jane heels. At least no one could say she didn't look nice.

It was almost time for the festivities to begin, so she grabbed her things and stepped into the fireplace. A quick Scourgify on the other end had her clothes free of any lingering dust as she surveyed the main living area of the first floor.

Lavender's laughter filled the room, floating in from the kitchen. A soft smile lit up Rhian's face as a bit of the tension in her body eased. It's going to be okay. This was home, and the Song's would never let anything bad happen to her.

Subject: Re: Home Is Where The Heart Is (Connor) Sun May 06 2018, 22:39

Connor's life had changed significantly since the new year came. For one thing, the idea of 'loving Rhian' was pushed aside as his dignity refused to let that happen. And if he was perfectly honest, the first few nights he had not been able to sleep. The 'what-ifs' haunted him more than he cared to admit. But he forced himself to move on. Because if he allowed himself to succumb to her, her tantrum would have won. And if he ever missed her, he replayed her tantrum making him realize she was not as perfect as he once thought of her to be.

But then again he too had changed. Once he lost her he decided to change his perspective. Claire was very clear in showing him that life was not forcing you to stick with someone forever just because you slept with one another. And once she graduated, he found himself smiling fondly at the lessons. Ever since then he dated, he found himself not settling for the first girl and instead enjoying his youth. He felt better about himself, grew confidence and knew who he was. That was the best thing over all of this.

Yet today he was a bit nervous as he shifted from one room to another in the Song household. For today was his granny's birthday and that meant that Rhian was coming over. When she had moved out his grandmother had cried upset over it but he allowed himself to comfort her, only telling her that it was time. And it was. Because they weren't kids anymore and he was no longer in love with her.

At least that's what he told himself. Especially once he saw her come in. He lifted his glass as a greeting while his grandparents rushed to meet her. His mother and father both shook her head at their actions. But it was hard not loving the girl.

Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

"What in Merlin's name have you done with yourself, child?" Lavender's melodic voice gasped in astonishment after she'd hugged Rhian to her. The woman stepped back to arms length, touching the shorter length hair gently in acknowledgement.

Rhian laughed. "I thought it was time to shake things up a bit. You're not mad are you?" As silly as it was, she needed Lavender and Atticus to approve. Yes, she was an adult and it was time to strike out on her own. But she loved them dearly, and hoped they'd still support her no matter what she did. Even if it mean't moving away.

A strong but gentle hand settle on her shoulder as Atticus moved to stand beside her. "It's odd, I'll give you that. But you wear it well, dear."

Her grin couldn't have gotten any bigger if she'd wanted it to. It had been a few weeks since she'd moved out, and she'd tried to solidify the decision in her mind by staying away until now, worried that she'd just move back if the homesickness was too much. It almost overwhelmed her even now, until she moved further into the room and caught site of the other three.

The smile on her face faltered for a moment as her eyes locked with Connor's. She'd imagined this a million times this week alone, but still wasn't prepared. Nothing had changed, he was still so...him. Her chest started aching, but she ground her teeth together as she shook hands with his parents, turning her attention to them.

"Thank you for inviting me," she said to Connor's mom. She'd known the date of course, but had received the owl mentioning a planned dinner a few weeks back. Rhian figured it had come from Lily, and not her husband.

Subject: Re: Home Is Where The Heart Is (Connor) Sun May 06 2018, 23:33

Blonde

She was blonde and if he was honest he didn't like it. He missed her long brunette locks and the way her eyes popped even more beautiful than ever. Ever since he was out into the dating world he seemed to always be attractive to girls very similar to the girl in front of him. But he told himself it was better to have a replica of her than her exactly. Because if he was honest, he was tired of hurting.

The dismantling of their friendship seemed to have affected all aspects of his life. Ben especially. He knew his best mate was still not over what happened in January. And he was still making amends on that. But his disinterest in just being the old him tended to affect his drinking. But he was clean.

Water. Water was in his cup and he told himself that he was done drinking, especially once his mother greeted Rhian as she always did: warm yet detached. His father in turn walked into the kitchen, not wanting to touch hands with a muggleborn. It seemed that his father would never change no matter how his mother begged him to.

He briefly wondered if he should have greeted her or just stay in the background, but with his grandmother looking at him expecting something he found himself biting the bullet.

"I'm glad you came" He said softly before, per routine, his lips found her cheek. From the corner of his eye her could see his grandmother being pleased by his action and his mother's grip tightening on the glass.

Pulling back he allowed proper distance between the pair as he took her in. She wasn't the girl that he knew. 'Grow Up' was what he had told her, but this was far different than he expected.

"Congratulations on your move"

Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

His voice was exactly as she remembered it. An almost palpable force itself, she let it wash over her like a comforting blanket. Her eager grin from earlier was now a barely-there upturn to the lips as Connor moved closer. Rhian felt like the air had been sucked out of the room as his lips contacted her cheek, her body frozen in place.

It seemed forever ago that she'd told him she'd gotten accepted to MAE. That she would be following in his footsteps, chasing a dream she'd never thought possible for herself. He'd been so happy then. They both had been.

And then she'd gone and fucked it all up.

"Thanks," she responded breathlessly. She couldn't keep his gaze, not if she wanted to hold herself together. Instead, her eyes settled on the soft package in her hands. His next words surprised her, though they shouldn't have. She should have known he'd find out.

"Yes, well," she scanned the living room as everyone seemed to move to the other room, their voices filtering through the new quiet around her and Connor. "It was time to be on my own." In more ways than one, her inner voice spoke resolutely. If people were going to leave her, she may as well get used to being alone.

Subject: Re: Home Is Where The Heart Is (Connor) Mon May 07 2018, 00:00

This was wrong all of this; because as much as Connor missed her, this was not the same dynamic as before. Both looked unsure of one another and awkward. It was not like their old days were his granny would laugh and just hum 'Here comes the bride' at every opportunity she could around the teen.

This was different, he was different and he no longer recognized her. He was sure there was something under there, something that reminded him of the girl he once loved. But this wasn't the time or the moment. Because to him, the idea of them coming together was done. The moment she not only cursed him out, but left and never returned to him.

One month. Two. Three. Three months and not even an owl telling him she was okay. That was enough of a signal for him to truly let himself succumb to the world around him.

"Good" was all he could say to her statement.

It was at this time that he murmured some excuse about helping his father that caused him to leave. But in reality he needed space; he needed to think, to build some kind of wall against the girl he once knew.

"Wine?" His father asked with a knowing smile.

"No thanks" he said shaking his head. "Trying to be good dad"

A small twist of a smile rose in his father's face before he patted his shoulder. "And for that I commend you. There is no reason to fall for that...that situation. You're better than that"

His aversion to Rhian was clear enough and he found himself simply nodding, not wanting to start a disagreement.

Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

Rhian was thankful Connor walked away then. He didn't have to see the hurt in her eyes, the way they watered without her consent. She hung back in the living room by herself, trying to bring her world back under control. Taking a short walk around the furniture she'd lounged around on as a child, her eyes landed on a table by the front window lined with photographs.

She'd spent hours looking at these, especially when she first arrived in the wizarding world. It was a shock to see the images moving across the page, seeming to look back at her from their frames. There was an old black and white one, or her foster parents on their wedding day. Much younger than they were now, Rhian could still make out the familiar features on the pair of them. There photos of Lily and John as well, when they were younger. One with them holding Connor as a baby too.

Her hand stilled on one of the newer ones. Still a few years old, it was from Connor's last Quidditch game at Hogwarts. The family had come to see him play at the school, since he had no plans to continue on professionally, they wanted to celebrate his last time. Rhian could remember the game easily. He'd played well and hard, easily the strongest flier up there. Atticus had taken the picture after it was over, urging Rhian and Connor together for it. Looking at it now, she could see her arms around his waist in a side hug, easier than anything. And his eyes were shining like they used to.

Her thumb brushed over the image once more before she wiped a stray tear away, taking a deep breath. Nothing for it now, she thought.

Delicious smells were wafting in through the kitchen, pulling her towards the small gathering. She entered the room not far from were Connor and his dad stood. John's words floated towards her softly and her step faltered slightly. It wasn't surprising, really. Rhian knew he didn't like her. He was just usually more careful with saying something around the others. And she'd never heard something so openly...cruel from him before.

She sniffed softly, hoping there was no indication that she'd cried. Her head lifted slightly in an attempt to steel her nerve as she moved over towards Lavender, who sat at the table talking with Lily. "Here, Lav. This is for you."

The package was easily opened to reveal a delicate shawl. In soft purples and grays, the silhouette of a dragon spread across the back. "Oh! It's lovely, Rhian, thank you!" The older woman made to stand, taking a moment to do so. Setting the shawl around her shoulders, she moved in a circle to show it off. After a few more moments in the lime-light, Lavender motioned Rhian over to the kitchen to grab a plate of food.

Subject: Re: Home Is Where The Heart Is (Connor) Mon May 07 2018, 00:35

The reason that his father hated Rhian was not a surprise. Ever since his grandparents took in the 'stray' he found a multitude of ways as to why she was a wrong fit. Her first accidental magic had been an inconvenience for him. The idea of his son mixing with her kind seemed unheard of. But his mother usually calmed him down. She would tell him that it was bound to happen and that Connor would one day simply be forced to mingle with them in school.

He in turn always found a way to bring he and Rhian together, no matter what his father said. He had gone over a scenario in his head where he told his father that they were together and that they would get married. Over and over he practiced for when the time was right and he could confront his father. But that time never came.

The way her voice carried made him jump and wonder if she had heard that horrid things his father said. The moment he took her in he knew she had heard. He found himself trying to apologize from afar. He was sorry for everything, sorry his father was this way, and sorry he wasn't brave enough to do more. But that was life.

With his granny spinning in her present a small smile rose from his face. His grandmother was lovely. And once they moved to lunch he made sure to sit away from her. His granny was not having it though, especially when she ranted about how much time she spent on the name cards only for them to be ignored. So once more they sat together as he went over his favorite team members in Quidditch to calm down.

It was now when his grandmother began to talk about the old times. "Oh darling, remember the year that the two of you planted me a rose garden? It was one of my favorite presents...despite the accidental magic that caused my garden to be a haven for gnomes. Still one of mt favorites"

Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

Rhian had always felt at home in this townhouse, despite the unwelcome looks from John. During meal times, or family game nights, she'd never felt self-conscious or like an odd duck in any way. That was not the case today. Unsure of herself, she let her foster mom shuffle her into a seat beside her, next to one with Connor's name in front of it. Where she would have welcomed this before, a hollow feeling came over her.

Was this what the rest of their lives would be like? Pretending to be what they once were, to keep his grandparents happy. She could practically feel the tension rolling off of Connor as he sat beside her.

It felt as if she was underwater. Or in a dream. Everything seemed to move slowly around her, the others starting in on their meals with almost orchestrated ease. She almost felt like a spectator, on the outside looking in. Focusing on the plate in front of her, using the food as a reason not to talk much, she couldn't help but notice Connor in her peripheral vision.

She could practically feel him beside her, even though they had enough space not to touch. His usual scent, some kind of soap and something that was just him, filled her senses and she let her eyes close. Rhian figured she was allowed a moment to be a masochist.

Lavender's words drifted through her reverie. Looking back on this moment, Rhian would have sworn she was drunk on memories. Her eyes opened to look over at Connor, a soft smile reaching her eyes tentatively. "Mine too."

The moment was broken when she reached for her water glass, hoping to clear her mind. She really should try to engage. "Although, I'm not entirely convinced those gnomes came just for the roses," she laughed softly. That year had also been the first that Atticus had tried growing vegetables instead of just flowers.

Subject: Re: Home Is Where The Heart Is (Connor) Mon May 07 2018, 01:07

This was all too fake. Fake smiles, fake small talk all fake and Connor wanted to run out of this lunch. For his father clearly droned all of them out as he ate and his mother, bless her tried to engage him only to fail every time. It was as usual that his granny decided to force conversation, force the calmness and force them to play nice.

Except, Connor wasn't sure if it was the right time. Rhian played along well enough, but he could not make that same effort. Instead his father once more lifted his glass and Connor nodded. At once the wine glass filled and he allowed an audible sigh to be released as he allowed himself one glass. After all, he was only human.

As the tales continued of their foolishness in childhood, it hurt Connor more than he cared to admit. Those tales of silliness now seemed that they came out of a story, he no longer felt inclined to play along and play house. A boiling of annoyance rose within him during all of this. How was she okay to play along when he, felt uncomfortable in his own family?

One large gulp of wine later he found himself changing the conversation almost forcefully.

"Granny, where are you and grandpa traveling this year? Now that you don't have anyone to look after it only seems time for you two to take a proper trip."

It was easy enough territory where his grandpa would ramble on and he would be safe from having to say anything. He wanted to push any idea of nostalgia away from him. He did not need to revert that way. He had done that enough on his own.

Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

It wasn't long after Lavender's trip down memory lane that Connor piped in. And while Rhian was hoping for some kind of reprieve from the tense air between them, she was left greatly disappointed.

'Anyone'. As if the girl he'd grown up with, had supposedly cared so much about, was just anyone. Rhian read that message loud and clear, along with the very obvious ploy to change the subject of the pair of them. If that's how he wanted to be, then she could play along. It was rather clear he had no intention of settling things today, so the young witch set her mind to simply enduring the next few hours and going home.

Maybe rethinking her New Years Resolution not to drink alone.

Conversation moved easily enough after that, as both she and Connor made efforts to keep it centered on the couple they both loved. When everyone started to lean back a bit in their seats, clearly sated from the wonderful roast, Rhian stood to gather plates. In the past she and Connor would poke fun at each other, trying to trade favors so they wouldn't have to do the washing. Today, however, it offered a chance to leave the room if only for a little while.

A small flick of her wand moved the plates through to the other room and into the sink. She could easily wave it again to have them cleaned but she knew how Atticus preferred the personal touch. Especially since they'd been eating off their wedding china.

As she set to work her mood sunk lower and lower, standing alone with everyone else behind her in the other room. A window above the sink gave a perfect view of the garden, and the roses that Lavender had mentioned. Rhian's mind drifted then, and when she went to move one of the rinsed plates into the drying rack it caught on the edge of the sink, falling to the floor into a million pieces.

"Shit," she murmured. "Everything's fine!" she called to Lily's inquiring voice. Nothing a little magic couldn't fix.

It wasn't until she set to work on the glasses that a sharp sting caught her attention, her palm on fire. "Ah! Crap, crap, crap." Rinsing it under cold water to get the suds off, blood was running steadily out of a not-exactly-shallow cut. Not good with the healing spells like Tess, all she could think to do was continue to run it under the water, hoping it would eventually stop.

Subject: Re: Home Is Where The Heart Is (Connor) Mon May 07 2018, 23:02

The never ending tightness in his throat didn't really cease even as he took in the wine. In fact, the bitterness on his tongue grew. Still, with every snarky comment was bitten back. He didn't understand why he was being a bit irritable, perhaps he was spending far too much time thinking about how Ben was, rather than truly being himself. But if he was perfectly honest, he knew exactly what it was: he was angry at how easily she managed to play nice. Why was it so easy for her?

He knew that question was the reason that he was so angry. Why was she okay when he was still hurting? He never felt so ugly in his life; he wanted her to hurt and he wanted her to pine the way he did for her. At every opportunity of his granny asking about a girl, a coy smile would forcefully rise at his face as he purposely stayed mum about it.

Because he would rather they wonder, than to admit that he had no need to commitment when he didn't need it anymore. The idea of romance was long dead, along with all hopes of them working out. He wanted to be angry that she somehow stole things from him: his family, his grandparents, his hopes and his aspirations of love.

So as she left, he found himself actually relaxing. It was easier to just not see her face. Soon he grew back to the sunny boy his granny lobed more than anything. It was easier to block her out as he was with his family. But it was the shatter of a plate that brought him back to her. His granny begged him to check on her 'precious' girl. And reluctantly he got up.

When he walked into the kitchen, he inwardly cursed figuring out what had occurred. A murmur allowed wandless magic to fix the precious plate. And before he knew it, he found himself moving to her and grabbing her hand thats was now flowing with thinned out blood.

"You're always so clumsy" he said somewhat frustrated and worried.

He used one of the kitchen towels to cover her hand tightly, before he found himself administering a simple charm to hold them over before proper care would be needed.

"Gran can fix it, I should get her" he murmured avoiding her gaze.

Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

Even though her heels were rather low, Rhian kicked them off, not wanting to deal with the pain in her feet along with that in her hand. It also allowed her not to have to bend over the edge of the counter, which was awkward for the short witch. At this height, she could rest her elbow on the edge and allow the cold water to seep into her body, washing away the blood.

Her head turned suddenly, hearing that low baritone that could only mean one person. Pain was clear in her eyes, but she didn't try to hide it. At least she had a legitimate reason to show for it now, though if she let all her sadness out in that gaze then who was to blame her?

She expected him to leave, once he'd fixed the plate. Frozen to the spot with confusion, Rhian hissed as he took hold of her hand, both from the shock of pain and from feeling him again. His hand was strong around her own small one, but gentle. Tears stung at her eyes as something in her threatened to spill over.

"I know. I'm sorry," her voice was small, embarrassment flushing her cheeks. Watching as he used a cloth to apply pressure, then an easy charm, Rhian had to fight everything inside herself not to tuck herself into his arms. Home was less than a foot in front of her, yet it may as well be a mile.

He was pulling away then, as if it had been nothing, but her fingers caught on his gently, "Wait." When he didn't pull away immediately, she placed her other hand around his, eyes locked on where she could feel them connected after all this time. "Please, don't go. I'm..." Her eyes closed in frustration, not letting the tears fall even though the coated her lashes. "I'm sorry about this. I'm sorry about December. I'm sorry for all of it. I don't mean to make this hard on you. Tell me how to make it stop hurting, please. I don't know how."

For all that Tess valued Rhian as a fountain of emotional knowledge, she was truly lost.

Subject: Re: Home Is Where The Heart Is (Connor) Mon May 07 2018, 23:42

Connor didn't know why he had done it but he had. He had wanted to help her because he knew deep down he did love her. Maybe not the way or the amount that he did before, but it was clearly enough for him to want to be okay. Forget human decency, it was far from that, rather it was because he somehow always ended up being pulled into her crap.

And sure enough, as he tried to snap out of it she managed to hold him up by asking him to wait just one moment. He found himself flinching at her touch, even more so as her large eyes made contact with his own. He wanted to pull her close and properly hug her, but damn it, it was not right.

All of this was ill timed. He was glad she was apologizing but there was retained anger within him, anger that he refused to properly say what he thought. The last time they properly spoke with one another he had controlled in his anger.

"Stop" he said with anger running clear in his tone. "I don't want to hear this now. Have some decency, it's Gran's day." Still her tears always upset him like nothing else and he briefly allowed his fingers to wipe the few tears that escaped. "We need to talk, but not now"

Pulling away he found himself running away as he called for Gran. He couldn't do this here.

Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

Rhian was shocked to say the least. She hadn't known what to expect out of him.

No, she did. And that was the problem. She expected him to be her friend. To be the man that he's always been, her rock and her safe haven. But instead he scolded her like a misbehaving child. If her tears escaped now it was because her face was lacking any sort of emotion to hold them back. No knew ones formed however.

As Connor brushed the ones that landed on her cheeks away, Rhian felt numb from the inside out. He left then, and Rhian starred blankly at the empty space before her.

What's the point anymore? she didn't know. For months now, she'd tried to make herself forget him. And one damned afternoon ruined it. She tried to play nice and it pissed him off. She opened up for one moment, and he berated her. The more she thought about it, the angrier she felt. As if something burned in the pit of her stomach. But not the wild, destructive fire from all those months ago. This was like fire and ice mixed together, making time slow and heightening her senses.

Her hands had clenched to her side, the injured palm pulsing hotly despite the charm. She slipped back into her shoes and reentered the dining room.

Moving over to Lavender, she didn't try to put too much of a smile on. "I'm sorry to clean and leave, Lav. But I lost a battle with your plate and should have my friend look at this. She's studying healing and would welcome the practice." With a quick kiss to the woman's cheek, and a squeeze to Atticus's outstretched hand, she was to the Floo before anyone could really stop her.

As the magical flames engulfed her, she could see Connor's eyes from a moment ago as she locked gazes with him. What he was feeling, she didn't give two shits. But her own eyes held a quiet fire, one she'd never felt before. It wasn't like last time. Instead...it was like she was seeing him for the first time. Being seen anew.

She was done reaching out to him. It was clear she was nothing more than a child in his eyes. One that he never really loved, despite his confessions. And if he had...it was obviously not the kind of love she was interested in.

» Connor O' Donaghue
» In for a Treat (Rhian and Connor)
» Connor William Bailey
» Torn Apart; Brought Together (Connor)
» Sophia Heart