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     Losing My Mind (Rhian)

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    Tess Holmes

    Tess Holmes

    Healer In Training


    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySat May 05 2018, 23:33

    March, 2041

    Stretch.

    Kick.

    Run.

    Punch

    Stretch

    Kick

    Run

    Punch

    Stretch

    Run


    Like a mantra, Tess found solace in working her body. It was unusual, for she usually tried to exhaust her mind by being chaotic in the potions lab. That all soon changed once she realized the face she was avoiding would typically find solace in her spot. She was angry, furious at the thought of changing routines, but that morning, she found herself forgetting yoga and instead finding a proper contact sport.

    Before, Quidditch would have been what she used. She had a captain that would take sick joy out of throwing quaffles on them to make sure they dodged. It was sick, yet when the adrenaline hit the bruises were long forgotten and the haze let her mind die down.  But now she was too old for that, so she found this pent up aggression. And in the need to punch something she went to the Auror training grounds to tire herself out. And she tried her hardest.

    Because Tess Holmes did not lose control. All her emotions needed to be in check at all times, because she would never allow herself to fall victim to them. She knew that when she got angry she grew chaotic and irresponsible. The magic around her tended to be like electricity and she refused to have another incident. Not since the accidental flooding, she would never let that happen again.

    So she avoided a body of water. Instead she ran. She ran like she was running from her emotions. (Which she was.). Her feet slapped the pavement as she curved, no one intended to bother her as the anger was clear and her aggression was pouring out of her. She had already mangled one doll, and now she wanted to simply tire herself enough to sleep.

    It had been two months. Two Months and he had yet to properly come back to her and talk like civil adults. Instead that bastard avoided her, and she was too prideful to admit that it hurt. Was it really that awful what happened?

    "Fuck him" she hissed through her teeth as she stopped running to attack one of the dummies once more with angry punches and kicks.
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    Rhian Kael

    Rhian Kael

    Dragon Trainer In Training

    Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 00:56

    Rhian felt nerves turning her stomach. No matter the excuses she replayed in her head - ever growing homework load, more shifts at the bar - there was never a good enough reason for how long it had been since she and Tess had properly hung out. The first month after the disaster that was Christmas was mostly Rhian's fault. She had ignored owls left and right. But the two months since...they'd almost stopped all together.

    If this had been any other time in their lives, Rhian would have rushed to Tess right away and demanded to know what was wrong. But now, she hesitated.

    These last few months, Rhian had really taken Connor's words to heart. 'Grow up', he'd said. So she'd set about doing just that. After the holidays had died down at the bar, she'd approached her boss about taking on more. She'd been working there for nearly five years now, and knew everything there was to know. It didn't take much to convince the man to promote her up to assistant manager. They worked her schedule well enough for her to be effective at the bar, yet allow for school work and classes.

    And while she and Heath had talked about remaining friends, they'd only gone for coffee once or twice, with not much to talk about. He was pleasant, Rhian knew. She just wasn't in the mood to entertain someone else. It was probably why she'd declined invitations to spend time with Tess as well, feeling that she'd have nothing to offer in companionship.

    If she listened to her heart, Rhian would have to admit she was afraid as well. Connor leaving her....well, that hurt more than she wanted to put into words. So she didn't. She didn't talk about how it had taken everything she had as a scared ten year old to trust someone new. How hard it had been to embrace the Song's and the Bailey's when she'd been dropped on their doorstep. Even how difficult it had been to let Tess in when they first met.

    What if Tess left too?

    Rhian shook her head as she walked across the grounds of the Academy, determined. If Tess was going to leave, she'd have to give her something to leave. Rhian would be damned if she would just let their friendship crumble all because she was shit at trusting. It hadn't taken long for her to figure out where the other witch would be, if not the potions labs.

    The running track was empty, but she heard rhythmic sounds coming from an area where they had combat dummies set up for training. While it was still March, the weather was thankfully tad warmer than it had been lately. Her dark denim jeans and sweater were enough, accompanied by a relatively new dark green leather jacket. The dark colors set off her new hair rather well.

    Platinum blonde, and straight to her shoulders. Set off with a bold lip stain, Rhian was embracing the new her.

    A few minutes watching Tess attach the helpless dummy had a small smirk curling across her face. When she was done, Rhian clapped softly. "I'd say he is thoroughly bested, Holmes. The others are shaking in their boots."
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    Tess Holmes

    Tess Holmes

    Healer In Training


    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 01:13



    With every hit and every punch, Tess let her tears fall. First out of embarrassment; how dare he just leave her after everything? Was she bad at reading people? He kissed her. He came to her home. He shifted everything. And she stupidly allowed herself to be vulnerable. To let her walls fall around her and simply feel. It was embarrassing how she felt so much. Her body still shivered as it replayed in her head.

    One strike to the right, was enough for the dummy to decapitate and morph back to normal. She replayed the way he pulled back, disgusted at what had happened. Her shoulders shook and her punches grew softer as she let some tears blur her vision. That moment had scared her; she had never felt something in a simple kiss like that. And the rejection that came with it, brought on confusion and anger. So much anger that she found herself shakily continuing.

    'No one can break you. They've tried' she thought. And if her father couldn't break her, why could anyone else?

    But he had left her, avoided her like a coward. And she would not stand for it. She was a Holmes, and they were not pawns in games, they created games. She hastily kicked the dummy before wiping some tears.

    The clapping made her tense and she tentatively turned around to find a familiar face. Thankfully it was not the person who hated her now, but rather the other person in her life that was avoiding her. If she was honest, she wasn't relieved to see her the way she usually liked. But rather a bit unsure as to how to deal with this. Rhian avoided her, and now she was a blonde?

    Lifting her hands she wiped her face, thankfully having her tears look like perspiration and her red cheeks to show the exhaustion. Taking her in she looked a bit confused.

    "What did you do to yourself?"

    It was a nice distraction to her own inner turmoil, because Tess did not like change. Especially in someone that grounded her so well. 'Well she grounded you until she tossed you aside because of boy problems' the chaotic hurt part of her snarled.

    Her fingers tingled and she formed fists hoping to calm her emotions down one more.
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    Rhian Kael

    Rhian Kael

    Dragon Trainer In Training

    Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 01:29

    Rhian could only grin mischievously at Tess's response. The other girl looked exhausted after her workout. Rhian caught site of a bag by the edge of the training area, a towel sitting on top. It looked clean and folded, so she grabbed it and tossed it to Tess.

    "That's exactly what Ric said at the bar. After he picked his jaw up off the floor." The man was like an uncle. What Rhian assumed an uncle would be like. And he hadn't stopped poking at her about the change in appearance for at least a week. "Thought I'd try something new," was her answer to Tess's clear confusion.

    The fists hadn't been missed, neither had the swirl of emotions across Tess's face. While most people thought her the usual cold and calculated Holmes, like her oldest brother, Rhian had known her better than anyone over the years. There was hurt in her eyes. And she was the cause.

    Her feigned confidence fell as guilt overrode her features. She took a few tentative steps closer. "I'm sorry I haven't....you know. Been around." She stuffed her hands into her pockets, for warmth and for something to do with them. Her eyes traveled over her friend, hoping there was a way towards forgiveness written somewhere on her.

    "I've been an arse."
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    Tess Holmes

    Tess Holmes

    Healer In Training


    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 01:41



    As the towel was thrown her way she caught it and wiped her face in hopes of feeling better. Thankfully her mask was still on, she would not cry to early and in public. Even in a weekend, it was rare that she allowed herself to have a good cry.

    But the girl before her had seen it all. She had seen the tantrums that Tess had gone through, the love, the hate, the destruction. But never had Rhian ever been the cause of any bad emotions. Rhian reinforced all the good in her, forced her to open her heart and be human. But she hadn't been around when she had her own heartbreak. 'This is not heartbreak, it's embarrassment' but the ache made her question that.

    Still, as Rhian began to apologize, Tess forced herself to relax. This was not someone that purposely hurt her, this was someone that loved her and she loved back. Neither purposely hated one another, nor sought to harm one another, so it felt better to just let it go.

    "I need to get clean" she grabbed her things and signaled Rhian to follow her. She knew she needed to not feel so uncomfortable in her skin.

    So with one shower and change later she sat across from the girl that she felt more herself. It was until they were more in equal footing that Tess took the apology.

    "You really have been an arse, but I missed you" it was as simple as that. "And it hurt that you pushed me away, especially because" she frowned. "I've been feeling things and you aren't there"


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    Rhian Kael

    Rhian Kael

    Dragon Trainer In Training

    Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 01:53

    Rhian nodded in understanding and fell in step behind Tess as she led them towards the changing rooms and showers. There was a small lobby that she waited in that had couches and chairs. It was comfortable enough and Rhian picked up a magazine that was sitting out on the end table to pass the time.

    In no time at all Tess was out and seated across from her. Apologizing wasn't something Rhian usually had to do with her best friend. Most of their time together, if one of them was saying sorry it was usually Tess. Not often, really, but that was usually the way of things. It was rarer for Rhian to have been in the clear wrong, like she was now.

    But as Tess agreed right out of the gate, she couldn't help a small hopeful smile lighting her face. They would get through this. She nodded to show she'd missed Tess too, as it seemed the other girl had more to say and she didn't want to interrupt.

    If she was expecting anything, and she'd tried not to, it hadn't been that. Her brow furrowed with curiosity and worry. It had taken many years, and a lot of convincing, for Tess to open up to the idea that emotions weren't always bad.  It had been a long while since Tess had talked about them like this.

    A bit hesitant, Rhian closed leaned forward on her elbows, her fingers lacing together as she focused on her friend. "Well, I'm here now. And I'm not going anywhere." Her eyes conveyed how much she meant that.

    "What have I missed?"
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    Tess Holmes

    Tess Holmes

    Healer In Training


    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 01:59



    This felt right. They were okay, not perfect, but manageable and she could live with that for now. Because Tess was a creature of habit, she liked certain foods, certain drinks and people did not shift in her axis. So rarely did they come in, that rarely anybody left. Rhian was her anchor, and the book on emotions, since she had a plethora of them.

    She wanted to ask her friend so many questions, but for the past two months ,she felt her emotions going from annoyance to anger, to embarrassment and she had no one to distinguish what all this meant. She knew how to feel, the why was always the tricky part. Why were emotions so complicated?

    "What have I missed?"

    That simple questions was so heavily weighted in her mind. That in some way she felt her bottom lip wobble and in a horrified moment her vision blurred as the sentence came out.

    "He hurt me" It was a whisper, soft and in a tone that was reminiscent of the lost little girl she once was. The crack, the tiny crack in her perfectly molded world had come and she had denied this to herself. She covered her face as the lump in her throat rose and no words came out, just a hiccuped and horrifying sob.

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    Rhian Kael

    Rhian Kael

    Dragon Trainer In Training

    Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 02:20

    Before Rhian knew what was happening, she saw Tess's usually calm demeanor crumble. Instinctively, she reached over to rest her hand on her friend's arm, lending her strength and comfort to talk about what was bothering her.

    But Tess's words shocked her. Questions flew through Rhian's mind so fast she didn't have time to process them as Tess broke down even more. She set it all aside as she pulled the other girl to her in a soft hug. Rhian was the smaller of the two, but she'd be damned if that mattered right now. Wrapping her arms around Tess, she was determined to hold the girl together through physical will if that's what Tess needed right now.

    She could feel her friend's body wracked with sobs as she held her. "Let it out." One of her hands moved around to grip her wand as she cast a quick Disillusionment Charm. That way, if someone did come in, they wouldn't pay them any mind. It was a Saturday morning though, so she'd be surprised to see anyone out this way.

    Turning her attention back to the girl in her arms, she let her mind wander as Tess pulled herself together. Who, exactly, was she talking about?! Had she met someone in the months they hadn't been in contact? Was there some mystery man she'd missed? If so, what had happened to Ben? A twinge of old regret threatened to surface, but she shut it down quicker than anything. She would not feel bad for not having Connor there to tell her what was going on from the other side of things.

    What was worse, Tess had said 'he' had hurt her. Was she being literal? Was she out there on that field this morning fighting that dummy because she wanted to hurt this man? Had someone laid a hand on her? Rhian's could feel the anger start to burn in her veins. The last few months had consisted of her tramping down any emotion that was too strong, in any sort of realm (anger, sadness, loss). But she could feel her blood beginning to boil in new ways.

    "If someone laid a hand on you, I swear I'll gut them faster than they can beg me not too." The wand that was still in her hand send out a few soft, harmless sparks, so she tucked it safely away.
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    Tess Holmes

    Tess Holmes

    Healer In Training


    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 02:32



    Tess was embarrassed. She was on campus and doing the thing that she promised herself she'd never do: she was crying over a boy. A boy who she had told herself she would not like that way, a boy who dug his way into her head and played mind games that she had no way of knowing how. So as Rhian thankfully shielded the pair and held her close she found herself weeping for a second.

    She felt pathetic allowing herself to be so wrought with confusion over all of this. She just wanted to be safe. How did this happen? Was it so hard to try to be happy in a world that controls your every move? A string of curses were thrown out there as Rhian shushed her quietly.

    "If someone laid a hand on you, I swear I'll gut them faster than they can beg me not too."

    It was comforting the amount of anger radiating from her friend. While both were often times each other's confidants, it was rare to really be the one shielded from the world. She could count the times that Rhian held her as she cried, on just one hand. They were rare and incidents that she'd like to forget, but this one she brought to herself.

    "He's playing with my head and I don't get it." she murmured softly as she tried to compose herself. "This was all a business deal, Merlin Rhian" she pulled back cheeks red. "All of this was fake. Ben and myself, a couple? Ludicrous right? But we wanted to be safe from marriage" she took a deep breath. "My dad keeps pushing me Rhian, he keeps throwing men my way and I-I needed that to stop. So Ben seemed fine but he broke the rules!"

    She was angry now, and she was relieved because angry was safe. Anger was a normal human emotion before it mixed into all the other oddities.

    "H-he broke into my house on his birthday and he was lonely. I-I had stupidly let my walls down Rhi, I-I showed him a cake I made for him because we were friends. And he just...be just" her eyes fluttered close. "He somehow thought it was okay to kiss me. Not like a kiss..but..it was like butterflies"

    Her cheeks reddened considerably at how much she spoke about something so minor. But it wasn't minor because with his gentility, his caress and his aura, he managed to soften her walls, allowing the butterflies to flutter in her stomach.

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    Rhian Kael

    Rhian Kael

    Dragon Trainer In Training

    Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 03:01

    When Tess pulled back, Rhian's own eyes watered at seeing her friend so hurt. There was a small box of tissues set on the end table, probably a regular courtesy. She pulled the box into her lap and offered a few to Tess, listening as she continued.

    So...it was Ben?! From the beginning of Tess's explanation, it still didn't really make sense. She had thought they were actually dating. Looking back on it, she should have known something was up. He was too odd, and nothing in the years she'd known Tess pointed to her being interested in someone like him. But she'd warmed to the idea enough seeing them at the party. They way Tess had curled into Ben's side so easily, before all of the drama ensued. But, she guessed, it had all been an act?

    Tess's voice started to crack as she stumbled through the next part. Her eyebrows nearly shot into her hair line. He did WHAT?! Broke into her house? And she didn't immediately hex him to kingdom come? She was going to have to talk to Tess about properly securing that flat or something.

    Then her friend laid it all out, and her jaw dropped. Tess had been kissed before, Rhian knew that. But every account before this had described forced embraces and unwanted shows of false affection. Nothing real. Apparently, Ben....Rhian shook her head to ground herself. The idea alone didn't make sense.

    But what Tess described, Rhian had to believe her that this was different. She was still a bit confused. She kept one arm around her friend for support, but gave her a bit of space. "So, you're hurt that he tried to kiss you and it...wasn't what you thought it would be?"

    She knew the other girl had problems with emotions. Was she mad that this strange boy was making her feel things?
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    Tess Holmes

    Tess Holmes

    Healer In Training


    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 03:16



    The retelling of her story aloud was realistically what replayed over and over again in her head. Because the motive was missing; that was what she failed to understand. It was at this brief moment she wished she had a mother to explain the way of normalcy. How boys acted, how girls were supposed to attract others and just how to be normal. But that was not the case. Rhian was as close as a female representation as she had. Because if her grandmother found out...she would have marched to the Watson house, and demand his head.

    Shaking those thoughts she looked at Rhian briefly who looked just as surprised. She figured it was easier to just re-tell it all. So she closed her eyes and she felt the scene play before her. It seemed all so real, like she was a spectator in the crime of the century.

    "Rhian...it was just the way he moved. I thought we were friends, I mean I bake you things all the time for your birthday. But he was left alone on his birthday and no one should be alone you know?" it was childlike the way she said it. "So when I baked him a cake and I hugged him and he called me nice. Then he just shifted." her fingers tingled with unwarranted magic. "His hands were so soft, surprising for someone who works in potions, but he pulled me to him" her breath hitched. "And he kissed me, impulsively so. I was so scared" she breathed out. "My heart was beating so hard it wanted to burst, and yet his kiss was soft, and out of no where."

    She covered her face and laughed self consciously. "It felt like those kisses you hear about. Where time stops and it's just...agh!" she kicked her bag childishly. "I kissed back and I don't know why! But it was then he basically ran off. He put me in that predicament, of feeling and he just left leaving me in the dark. Literally the dark since he burned out the only candles. And he's avoided me since."

    Turning over to her friend who knew emotions so well and was so sure about feelings she found herself looking clueless and vulnerable.

    "Did I do something wrong? Why do that then leave? He broke the rules, and I-I don't want that."

    It was clear that she did not want rejection which is exactly what she perceived happened. Afterall if he had felt something he wouldn't have run away right?


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    Rhian Kael

    Rhian Kael

    Dragon Trainer In Training

    Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 19:45

    A soft, sad smile tugged at Rhian's lips. No matter how the Holmes family tried to turn her best friend to ice, Tess had a soft gooey center just like she did. While Rhian was good at cooking in general, Tess did rather well with baked goods. As she said, there had been loads of times through their lives that Rhian received cookies or cakes, even pies once in a while. They always meant the world to her. The fact that she'd cooked for Ben said more than most people would realize.

    She listened at Tess's recounting of that night. The way this boy had broken through her perfectly crafted walls. Her eyes widened when her friend said she'd been scared. Was a kiss supposed to make you scared? Rhian didn't quite know. Heath had only kissed her on the cheek, maybe the hand. He deserved better, how much of a gentleman he had been to her.

    Rhian couldn't help but wonder if she would have felt these 'butterflies' if he'd actually kissed her during their time together. Probably not, as Tess had mentioned being kissed before now, sans butterflies.

    He ran off?! And why would he blow out all the candles? Her brow furrowed as she leaned back into the couch, a look of confusion and concentration on her face.

    "Well..." It was hard to say what Ben had been thinking. Rhian had thought she'd known about people. But the last few months...apparently not. And even on her best day, Ben was never someone she'd say she understood.

    "I can't imagine you actually did anything wrong, Tess. If he started it, and you...." her hand gestured, because she didn't quite know how to say 'went along with it'. "You know. Then I think he must just be as mental as everyone said. Why else would he run away from you? You're perfect!"

    Part of her job as best friend was to boost Tess's ego. In this case, it was easy. Rhian really did think she was practically perfect. Tears and all, she nudged her friends shoulder with her own, trying to make her smile.
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    Tess Holmes

    Tess Holmes

    Healer In Training


    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 19:55



    Tess shook her head and stared at her hands. While Rhian's comments were helpful, the insecurity that was there would not shut up. Because no, she was not perfect. She was far from it. She was insensitive, selfish, egotistical, and narcissistic. There was no regard to everyone in general, especially those that inconvenienced her. So how was it not possible that Ben simply realized it and decided not to get involved in the mess that was she.

    Sighing she looked at Rhian unsure as to how to move forward with all of this. Were women supposed to be this forlorn in love? Not Love Her mind immediately corrected her. But she felt something and that was frightening.

    "I think I'm going to just let my dad marry me off soon" Tess sighed. "I'm tired of fighting constantly for freedom. It should be easier to just let him win. He always wins"

    She was not meant to be courageous, that was never a trait she saw in herself. And the game was growing old, was it not easier to concede? She winced at the thought of the people that she could possibly be forced with.

    "It was easier before you know...it's like you don't know that you're living without color. And one day, one action, a kiss, can just show you the world and how it can be. Soon it immediately is taken away and you're left to see the world in grey again. It's disgusting"

    And it was. Because now she wanted soft touches, and kisses and being held and feeling something. But maybe it wasn't Ben. Maybe she was now willing to open up and let the world in.

    "What if it's hormones?!" she said suddenly.


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    Rhian Kael

    Rhian Kael

    Dragon Trainer In Training

    Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 20:10

    Now Rhian was thoroughly worried. Tess had never outwardly entertained the idea of simply going along with what was laid out for her before. Not like this. Sure, she could play the part of the 'perfect Pureblood lady' easily. With all her training growing up, Tess was a damn near skilled actress in that regard.

    But never like this. She shook her head slowly, trying to be the voice of relative reason here. "You've never given in this easily, Holmes. Not once. Not when it was something as terrible as attaching yourself to a stranger for the rest of your days.

    "And yes," knowing this was going to take a while, she set her heeled boots on the coffee table before them, "it would be easier to quit fighting. But when have you ever just backed down from something because it was easy?"

    In this instance, though....Rhian wouldn't have blamed her.

    She saw the wistful look take over her friend's features. Tess made it all sound so beautiful. Romantic. If she didn't know how infuriating Ben could be, she'd have sworn Tess had found some miracle man.

    A laugh escaped her. "It is hormones, you're not wrong on that." That wasn't what she meant, and Rhian knew it. She chose her next words carefully, knowing how vulnerable Tess was feeling right now. "Have you tried to actually...you know, talk to him? Since it happened. Any word through some mysterious Pureblood underground network?"
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    Tess Holmes

    Tess Holmes

    Healer In Training


    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 20:22



    Tess scoffed at Rhian's words. Had she ever taken the easier route? Often times yes, it was easier to concede certain actions, but for the most part her morals typically tended to force her to find an alternate path. One that would allow her to pretend to fold, only to find an alternate path. But this was tiring.

    In fact the girl beside her was a symbol of just how she was willing to break the rules. Her hands curiously traced her own full moon tattoo wondering just how much she had done to simply keep a muggleborn friend. But this was different. How much worse could it get if she simply gave up.

    But as her friend attempted to reason with her, Tess sighed once more. She was tired of those fleeting emotions. It was as if she was grieving an almost love. Disgusting really.

    "If I see him, I will do what I did to the dummy" she growled. "He made me look and feel like a fool. And no one. No one is allowed to make me feel that way." she clenched her fist tightly. "I don't want to talk anymore, I want to destroy him"

    Her eyes brightened in a way her brothers' did when they found something to destroy. The Holmes siblings took joy in destruction, in crushing an opponent and always rise atop of it all. That's something so deeply instilled in their blood that it was impossible to stop. The last time she felt that was was during sports, when she found herself wishing to crush anyone who stood in her way.

    "I want him to feel like I do" she said softly.

    She knew Rhian was never fond of her chaotic nature, but it came with being her friend, and no matter what Rhian did, it was not going to change in her.


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    Rhian Kael

    Rhian Kael

    Dragon Trainer In Training

    Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 20:46

    And the anger was back in Tess's voice. While Rhian was glad her friend wasn't one hundred percent down in the dumps, she knew better than some about the Holmes rage. She hadn't ever been the target, but Tess had told her enough stories about her family, and she'd seen when Tess got a less than satisfactory mark on a paper that deserved better.

    Rhian decided not to point out that the only person Tess had 'been a fool' in front of was the man himself. So, it really didn't make sense for that to be his reasoning. Usually someone did something like that if there was going to be a kind of audience.

    Showing support, Rhian nodded slightly. "Understandable. But Tess, do you have an actual plan? Beyond throttling a few dummies."

    And really, how would physically hurting someone make them feel what Tess was going through right now? Especially if Ben had, like she was thinking, done it out of some vindictive motive. If that was the case, then feelings wasn't something on his side of the equation.

    There was really only one way to know. Rhian took a deep breath, not sure at all about what she was going to offer. "What if I...I could maybe sniff around a bit."

    Ever the resourceful one, Rhian was sure she'd be able to find out something.
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    Tess Holmes

    Tess Holmes

    Healer In Training


    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 20:55



    The more logical side of Tess knew that she was being manic in her actions, but her pride would not allow her to want anything further than to see him on his knees. Again, anger, destruction and projection was much easier than admitting that she had done wrong. She brought this all upon herself. She had sought him out in hopes of having him be willing to go along with her plan. He looked disinterested in the idea of her and she was fine with it.

    But now, she was left confused and overall played. Was it so hard to simply have said thank you and left? She let herself properly be played and she was not going to let that happen today. She could feel herself actually building those walls in terms of emotions. There was no need o have anyone else additional other than the people that had proven worthy to be around her. And Ben lost his chance.

    "Sniff all you want, I just want to make sure you don't get hurt"

    It was that moment she knew that she had been a bad friend for not inquiring on her friend. Instead she cried and she acted for foolish. But her friend had been hurting, since December and that seemed unacceptable to her.

    "Want me to accidentally hurt that blonde?" there was no need to add a anything more. The mediwitch in training had similar classes with Tess and she was not above making people lose eyebrows if it only brought a smile to her friend's face. "Some missing eyebrows? There is no alluring smell as burnt hair"

    Her smile was more of a smirk, but her humor was at least coming back.

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    Rhian Kael

    Rhian Kael

    Dragon Trainer In Training

    Occupation : Bartender at Hookfang

    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 21:29

    Rhian could sense the shift in Tess as her friend set aside her concerns, turning her attention to Rhian more keenly. She knew when seeking out her friend that they'd absolutely get around to what was going on with her. It didn't make it any less uncomfortable.

    Sitting up with her feet on the floor, her body tucked in on itself once again, elbows leaning on her knees. "As funny as that would look," and it really would, "I'm not concerning myself with her anymore."

    And she hadn't. For a while now. In fact, Rhian went out of her way to not think about the beautiful which who'd initiated the biggest heartbreak of her life. Losing Connor had been worse than the feeling of hatred she remembered from her Muggle family. At least they had only been acting to their nature. Connor...he'd promised never to hurt her. Never to leave her.

    A lump was forming in her throat and she swallowed it down determinedly. She pursed her lips almost painfully to reign in the feelings that wanted to be let out. She would not allow it.

    "I'll see if I can catch Ben alone, either on campus or maybe at their flat. It shouldn't be that hard."
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    Tess Holmes

    Tess Holmes

    Healer In Training


    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: Losing My Mind (Rhian)   Losing My Mind (Rhian) EmptySun May 06 2018, 21:33



    Despite Rhian's rejection of the foul play that Tess was suggesting, she knew that deep down, she said it because she was a good person. A Gryffindor didn't lose their mane it seemed. It didn't matter, because Tess would still make sure to hurt the witch in a non destructive but socially embarrassing way. Because she was not above it, she was a snake through and through.

    "Okay" she said softly. "But don't go out of your way. It's clear to me I need no one but you."

    And that was definitely the case. Tentatively the girl took her friend's hand and squeezed knowing that there was more to talk about but perhaps not the time. It was fine, it was all in due time.

    "Come on, I want wine" tugging her up both girls walked off in hopes of getting sloshed and moving forward. Because they were better than the men in their lives.


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    Losing My Mind (Rhian) Empty
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